30 October 2012

How to Stay Entertained During a Power Outage

It typically occurs when you least expect it. The worst when it's during prime time television, when you have your favorite sport event on T.V. telecast Live. You're at the height of euphoria, seeing your favorite sport star trained do to what he or she does best and, at that exact pinnacle moment the power supply goes Kaput! Frustration turns to depression. So what do you do? Here's ten of mine:

  1. Read a book: Like a good doomsday prepper one should always have that favorite paperback within an arms reach. Reading is good for the intellect and a great way to pass the time.
  2. Pray: Blackouts could be ominous. So let's pray that it's not a precursor to evil. Pray that you have enough juice left in your cellphone to last you the duration. Pray that the power will get back on soon.
  3. Sleep. Relax the senses and strike when the time is right.
  4. Write a letter: A complaint letter to your utility company and tell it like it is.. Here's an example: Multifarious avenues of approach vie for attention as potential retorts to Sabah Electricity Sdn. Bhd. (SESB)'s untoward pranks. Instead of focusing on why Sabah Electricity Sdn. Bhd. (SESB) should get off its high horse, I would like to remind people that a war of ideas is currently raging. On one side are polyloquent thugs like Sabah Electricity Sdn. Bhd. (SESB) who fired the first shot by fragmenting the nation into politically disharmonious units. On the other side are people like you and me who are encouraging our spirits to soar. If this war teaches us anything, it's that we should evaluate the tactics Sabah Electricity Sdn. Bhd. (SESB) has used against me. (Goodness knows, our elected officials aren't going to.)Sabah Electricity Sdn. Bhd. (SESB) says that militarism is a be-all, end-all system that should be forcefully imposed upon us. Although Sabah Electricity Sdn. Bhd. (SESB) certainly cut that statement out of whole cloth, I claim I know why it has been developing a Pavlovian reflex in us, to make us afraid to reach the broadest possible audience with the message that letting the worst kinds of crapulous anthropophagi there are peddle the snake oil of coldhearted incendiarism is unthinkable. It considers it an interesting sociological experiment for determining whether people can be influenced to understate the negative impact of antipluralism. The reason Sabah Electricity Sdn. Bhd. (SESB) wants to bury our heritage, our traditions, and our culture is that it's thoroughly distasteful. If you believe you have another explanation for its foul-mouthed behavior, then please write and tell me about it. The space remaining in this letter will not suffice even to enumerate the ways in which Sabah Electricity Sdn. Bhd. (SESB) has tried to rip apart causes that others feel strongly about. Come to think of it, where did Sabah Electricity Sdn. Bhd. (SESB) learn how to make a fetish of the virtues of inerudite parasitism? At the intersection of Diabolism Avenue and Statism Lane? My point is that Sabah Electricity Sdn. Bhd. (SESB) has, on a number of occasions, expressed a desire to spew forth ignorance and prejudice. On all of these occasions I submitted to the advice of my friends, who assured me that I don't just want to make a point. I don't just want to turn its philopolemical ravings to our advantage. I'm here to give an alternate solution, a better one. I don't just ask rhetorical questions; I have answers. That's why I'm telling you that it justifies its rapacious harangues with fallacious logical arguments based on argumentum ad baculum. In case you're unfamiliar with the term, it means that if we don't accept Sabah Electricity Sdn. Bhd. (SESB)'s claim that going through the motions of working is the same as working then it will sensationalize all of the issues. As a parting thought, remember that Sabah Electricity Sdn. Bhd. (SESB) is doing some serious mau-mauing.
  5.  Workout: Pump some iron, push ups, get the heart pumping.
  6. Play an instrument: Grab that acoustic and let the six string fly.
  7. Take a shower: It's hot and humid, what better way to cool it.
  8. Eat. To your heart's content.
  9. Snuggle up to your loved one. Like there's no tomorrow. Awwwww......
  10. Pet your cat. Guinea Pig. Hamster. Parrot. Whatever that's furry. Except for Uncle hairy. Above all else be creative...

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